Toxic Behaviour

 

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I’ve been hearing a few stories of how this page, or my attitude to life, has influenced a few friends actions lately.
A friend (who hasn’t actually seen my page yet) has been having negative, hateful behaviour directed at her by someone recently. My friend is a good person, very giving. She hasn’t retaliated and has just spoken calmly and rationally to try and diffuse the situation. All to no avail. The other person continues to shout, scream and be toxic in their behaviour. My friend has been affected by this as she (like many of us probably) can’t understand why this person acts in such a way.

After one such episode, she was making some cakes (she’s a great baker of cakes!) and said she thought of me and my acts of kindness and thought that this person needed some love. So, she kept a cake and indirectly delivered it. She saw the recipient a few days later and the person looked straight through my friend. No thank you, no smile. This, I told my friend, is where you carry on being kind, not retaliating, not giving the person what they want, which is drama and negativity. Some people thrive on it!

Eventually the behaviour towards my friend should improve as the desired result isn’t happening. It may take weeks, years or may never actually happen, but my friend will not have lowered herself to that level where tit for tat happens. She needs to understand that she cannot control other people’s actions, only her reaction to them. Just letting it go will save a lot of stress, and stress shortens lives. Some people can’t be helped. You can remove them from your life or, if that’s impossible, just stay away as much as possible and be kind when near them.

 

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